Truth Be Told
by mysticmelodies1
Summary: She's the ultimate Bond Girl. The only one he'll ever need.
1. Complications

Inspired by this tumblr prompt: "Bond is used to being able to drive women wild with desire, turn them on with just a look and drive them to screaming orgasms within minutes. Then he & M finally act on their feelings, and the sex is great but it takes more foreplay than he's used to, she's not as effusively noisy, it takes longer to make her come and sometimes she just doesn't. M gently breaks it to him that at least some of those women were faking it & he has to re-learn how to be good in bed. Luckily, he has a good teacher.."

* * *

His hips began to move faster and his movements became more erratic, a telltale sign that he was close. She held on to him a little bit tighter, dug her nails into his shoulder the way he liked.

Then, the piece de resistance. She gave a soft breathy moan in his ear, as if he was filling her to the absolute brink and she couldn't stand it anymore.

"Yes…"

He came with a guttural shout of something that might have been her name, but his face was buried in her neck so she couldn't really tell. She decided a long time ago that she preferred not knowing either way.

The first time he'd taken her, in her office, he moaned something that sounded too much like her name and she slapped him soundly. It was her alias, but she threatened to have him shot nonetheless and he didn't doubt she meant it. She knew that he still whispered it under his breath when they were alone sometimes, though she couldn't decide if he thought she couldn't hear him or if he genuinely forgot. Cheeky bugger. It was more than likely the first.

When his hips finally stopped rutting and his breathing slowed, he registered one of her hands stroking circles on his back while the fingertips of the other resting softly on the nape of his neck. She hummed softly and he winced although he knew she couldn't see him.

"You didn't… did you?"

"No." She kissed his temple. "But I was entertained just the same."

He sighed and gently pulled out of her carefully rolling off to the side. He huffed and put his hand over his forehead as she pulled the sheet over her chest and reached over to the nightstand where her scotch was ready and waiting for her.

"Sorry. Was I supposed to scream and shout and confess my undying love for you?"

"Well maybe not the last bit, but… yes something like that."

"Really, James. We've been through this."

"Well… just a little more… excitement. I don't know… just… more. Moaning or something… I don't know… I mean could you at least look like you enjoy it instead of just lying there like… I don't know. I mean I normally don't have this problem."

"There's a first time for everything."

"Yeah, but this isn't exactly the first time, is it?"

"I did tell you I'm not very vocal."

"Well that's what they all say. But... look at me! I'm _me_! I'm _James bloody Bond for fucks sake!"_

"And?"

"_And_? _And_ this isn't supposed to happen to me. I'm the one person in the world this doesn't happen to." He paused and held up a finger. "No. This is not gonna turn into you psychoanalyzing me. We are not at HQ anymore."

She shrugged. "I wouldn't dream of it."

"I just don't get it. I'm me. I'm good. Fuck, I'm the best! Women come at the mention of my name. Why should you be so bloody different?!"

M shrugged at this. "Maybe I'm not as different as you think. Maybe I'm just the first one who's been honest with you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Have you ever stopped to consider that some of those women might have put on a bit of a show for you, just as you did for them?"

"Meaning?"

"That every body works differently. Realistically, you wouldn't have the very same effect on every woman you encounter. At some point or another, you probably ran into several of me. It's possible they just…" she shrugged. "…exaggerated a bit."

His mouth fell open and his brows knit together. "What are you saying- they faked it?"

"Well not all of them, no. I'm sure a fair few of them had a genuinely pleasant time. But surely you know women do that from time to time. I'm afraid even the infamous James Bond isn't immune to the oldest trick in the book. It's far more convenient than the headache excuse. We women can be quite the actresses when we need to be. Although we wouldn't have to go to such lengths if you men would just learn to take a simple no for an answer."

She watched in exasperation as he leapt out of bed in a huff. He began to pace back and forth on the carpet with his arms folded, tossing a sullen glare in her direction on occasion as if he believed it would have some real effect on her.

"I happen to do this for a living you know. I've made a career out of this. I know this game. Hell, I'm surprised you even remember how to go about it all." He scoffed. "Faked it. Please. Your problem is your body's just been out of the game too long. I don't think there's an orgasm left in you."

"Enough!" She cut him off with one of her famous ice queen glares. "You asked me a question. I gave you an answer. Don't sulk about like some school boy just because it wasn't the answer you wanted to hear."

She took another sip of her scotch and eyed him carefully over the rim of her glass. He paced back and forth across the floor, running a hand through his hair in frustration. She knew for sure he'd wear a hole in her good carpet if he didn't sit down soon.

She sighed. "James." He kept pacing. "James." She repeated his name louder this time. He stopped to look at her. "Please." She pulled back the duvet just a bit, and he took the silent invitation, slipping in beside her with a small huff.

They sat in silence for a few more moments and she sipped her scotch as she mulled a few things over in her head. She knew James to have a short fuse from time to time and she could understand why he would be upset about something like this given his outstanding track record in the bedroom. But there was something about the way he looked at her. She knew him well enough and she'd certainly known him long enough to know that there was more to it than he was letting on.

"Why is this upsetting you so much?"

He sighed. "I just... I'd rather not discuss it further."

"I know this is about more than the sex. There's something else, isn't there?"

"Sorry. Is this us _not_ discussing it? Because it feels like discussion."

"James," she warned.

"I said leave it!" He threw the duvet off and made to get out of bed but the moment his feet hit the carpet, he froze. He froze and he sighed.

He stayed silent for a few moments and she let him.

She's almost given up hope of him saying anything at all when he murmured one simple word.

"You."


	2. All For You

"_You._"

He was so quiet that if she hadn't been listening for it she wouldn't have heard it.

She stared at the back of his head for a few seconds not really knowing what to say. She opted for silence, feeling it was best to just let him finish.

"You were right. There was one girl. She did fake it. She told me afterward. She knew…" he paused and took a deep breath. "She knew when I was in bed with her… that I wasn't really there. She said she felt like I was somewhere else. With someone else. Like I wasn't really with her at all. And I wasn't. All I could see was you. All I wanted was you. All I wanted was to be back here with you, making love to you and holding you in my arms. But I was there with her and it wasn't the same thing. No matter how I closed my eyes and tried to block out the noises and smells. No matter how much I tried to pretend. She wasn't you. She said she could tell I wasn't there. That I was with someone else and there was only room in her bed for two so… she faked it." He gave a short, empty laugh. "You know, I don't even think I noticed. I was too busy wishing."

She gawped at him for a moment before realizing her mouth was hanging open uncharacteristically. She closed it and cleared her throat softly, the only noise to break the silence until he spoke again.

"It's always you. Every mission… every decision I make in field, whether or not you're in my ear. Even with those girls… I always pretend… I always pretend it's you. Truth be told it's the only way I can get through it. You're the only reason I bother to come home… and in one piece... even down to the color tie I wear to debriefing… it's all for you. Everything is… You."

"You don't mean that." She cursed herself for the way her voice caught.

His head shook slowly, helplessly. "Yes I do. God help me. Yes I do."

She put her scotch on the nightstand and lay back on the pillows. She thought is over for a second and grabbed the glass again, taking a rather large gulp before l, taking deep breaths in through her nose and out through her mouth, a method he recognized as one used to calm her thoughts.

"Why are you telling me this now?" She asked him with her eyes still closed, partially because she was afraid to look at him and partially because she was still focusing on her breathing.

"Because I need to know why," he said.

Her eyes snapped opened at this. She turned her head to look at him properly.

"Why what?"

He shifted back onto the bed and got under the duvet again, moving his body so that he was sitting facing her.

"I need to know… with anyone else it wouldn't really matter, but…" he sighed. "Why… why don't you respond to me?"

"Because you fuck me like I'm one of your flings. Hard and fast. Mechanical. As if you've got somewhere better to be. As if you've got someone else on your mind... which is fine if you do," she amended, trying not to sound too concerned. "But I'm not one of those girls, James. I realize we've crossed several lines with this…" she motioned between them. "…whatever _this_ is," she daren't say 'relationship'. "…but I should think I demand a bit more respect than one of your targets."

He paused, genuinely taken aback for a moment. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize…"

She sighed and shrugged. "It doesn't matter."

"Apparently it does."

"Honestly, it doesn't matter, 007," she stared into her glass and took another long sip.

"You're using my number, so honestly, it must." He took the glass from her lips and reached across her to set it down atop the nightstand on her side of the bed.

"What do you think you-"

Suddenly, he grabbed her face in both his hands and kissed her with all the passion he could muster.

She gasped and struggled against him for a few seconds, before giving up and allowing herself to get pulled into the kiss. She melted into his arms and she immediately felt the difference in this kiss.

This kiss wasn't 007, the agent.

This kiss was completely and totally James, the man.

It took her a couple of seconds to register that his lips were no longer on hers, though she could still feel the distinct, fiery tingle of where they had been. When her eyes finally fluttered open, she saw a faint smile playing across his face.

She cleared her throat and tried to slip her "M" mask back into place, but it didn't work too well given how flustered she was.

"What are you smiling at?"

She felt his fingertips brush the side of her breast and she jumped just slightly, making the corner of his mouth curl into a smirk.

"You moaned."

She looked down and pulled the sheet up to cover her chest again, realizing she'd dropped them at some point during the kiss.

"I did no such thing."

He chuckled softly to himself and kissed her temple. "Yes you did, M. You moaned. You liked it. And you know what that means." He crawled just a bit closer to her. "You care about me too. Admit it."

She scoffed. "Wouldn't you like it?" She turned to grab her scotch again.

"Yes. I would, as a matter of fact. And so would you." He grabbed her arm before she could take a sip.

She glared daggers at him but he didn't budge.

"You care about me… don't you?"

She lowered her voice to her most threatening tone. "Let go of my arm this instant, James."

'_Well at least it was James and not 007_,' he thought.

She set her scotch down again and took a deep breath. "Alright. Yes. I care. Are you happy now?"

"Yes, actually. I am," he smiled. "Aren't you?"

"No!" She whipped her head around and clutched the sheet tighter to her. "We can't do this."

"It's a bit late for that, don't you think?"

"We have to stop this then."

"Why?"

"You know perfectly well why. You and I both know things work out to everyone's advantage when feelings aren't involved."

"So you admit you have feelings for me?"

She put her hand over her eyes. "James, please..."

"I need to know. I need to know how you really feel."

"I've already told you I care for you. What more do you want?!"

"Yes, but you could care about anything. You could care about a pair of shoes, an heirloom. You care about a pet. You care about Eve, for fucks sake! Is that all? _You care_?"

"Alright!"

She gathered the duvet around herself and got off the bed, turning back around to face James.

"_I love you_! Is that what you want to hear?! I bloody well love you! The head of MI6 fell in love with James Bloody Bond! I love you!" Her voice cracked on the last few words and she rushed into the en suite bathroom as fast as she could manage and slammed the door shut behind her.

James thought he should have run after her but he was sort of frozen onto the spot by her confession. True, it was what he was hoping to hear, but he didn't think she'd actually come out with it. He figured she'd just come up with another way to weasel her way around saying the words. Wanting to hear her say it and then actually hearing it after so many years of wishing, well... he couldn't say he was entirely prepared. After a few moments, he finally managed to shake himself out of his stunned silence and pad his way over to the bathroom door to check on her.

When he went to knock, his internal alarm went off.

It was too quiet for his liking.

He put his ear to the door to make sure everything was alright. It didn't sound like the window was open. He didn't think she'd be bold enough to make the jump, but then again, he didn't put it past her.

He gently tapped on the door and called out her name and he heard a soft sob, which let him know she was still there.

"I'm sorry, M. I didn't mean to upset you. I honestly didn't. I just want you to know how much I care about you… how much I love you, and… I just wanted to know that my feelings haven't been one sided all this time… but I pushed too far. I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry. Look, I'll go. I'm sorry."

He turned and walked back to the bed, finding his carelessly discarded shorts and putting them back on. He found his trousers alongside the bed, with his shoes under the bed, and something else he didn't expect to find. He knew he shouldn't have, but curiosity got the better of him. He pulled out the old shoebox and began to sift through the old photos. There were dozens of photos all of him. Some of him with M at formal events. Some of him and other agents. There were some of him with his targets, though why M kept photos of him with other women was beyond his understanding.

"You looked so happy," her tear stained voice floated in softly from behind him. He looked over his shoulder to see her standing in the bathroom doorway in her dressing gown. "You didn't smile very often. I loved it when you did."

"I remember her," he smiled, holding up a photo of himself with a short brunette. She could have been taken for a younger version of M. "She was the easiest to get along with."

"Why?" M said, moving closer.

"She was witty and smart… and she didn't take bullshit from anyone. Very much like you," he smiled. "And she was around your height, so that helped a little in the bed department. Almost a shame she had to die." M cleared her throat. James chuckled. "Almost. She wasn't a patch on the real thing, of course."

M hummed her approval of his amendment and he sifted through some more of the photos and he found another one of them together that he didn't remember them taking. She told him she snuck it from the security footage at one of the Christmas galas one year as she couldn't find anyone to take a proper picture of the two of them.

"You looked so handsome in your blue suit… even when the invitation explicitly said tuxedo," she arched an eyebrow and cut her eyes at James. He just chuckled. "I supposed I should thank you that you had the decency to go home to shower and change so you didn't show up in rubble and ash covered Armani rags." She chuckled and nudged him with her shoulder, throwing him off balance just a bit. He laughed and she bit her lip and looked back down at the photograph. "The tree was gorgeous that year. Particularly large. I remember wondering how they managed to get it through the doorway without breaking it. That room didn't have windows, if I recall correctly. Oh, but it was magnificent. So many lights. And they brought out your eyes beautifully when you stood when you stood next to them."

"They complimented your jewelry very nicely too."

She lifted her gaze from the photo to look at his face. "What? You can't remember my jewelry."

"Try me," he smirked. "I remember your teardrop diamond necklace and matching earrings."

"What bracelet was I wearing?"

"Trick question. You were wearing two; a tennis bracelet and a plain silver bangle."

"Alright then, what color-"

"Red."

"How did you know what I was going to ask?"

"Well since we're covering all the minute details, next to jewelry, I figured the color of your nails was next on the list. Either that, or what color eyeshadow you were wearing. Demure grey smoky eye, by the way. Very tastefully done," he smiled.

"Were you really watching me that closely?"

"To be honest, I wasn't really paying attention to anything else. And yes, I know who I was supposed to be watching, and I did eventually get around to tracking him, but… I couldn't help it. I was in love with you. Even if I was too stubborn to admit it."

He reached out and caressed her cheek. She put the photo back in the box and he dropped the box on the floor, freeing his hands to roam her body. His hands traveled down her arms and she caressed his cheeks, her fingertips lingering on the contours of his jawline. She traced his Adams apple and slowly worked her way down to his chest while he worked his way up to her face again, tracing every line of her cheek, wanting to kiss every one. But he knew the time for that would come later. Her voice broke him out of his thoughts.

"James?"

He hummed his acknowledgement.

"Will you make love to me?"

He looked up to meet her eyes. "If you'd like."

She tilted her head. "Have you ever made love before?"

"What?"

"I know you've been with women, but… have you ever made love?"

His hands stilled and he thought about it for a second and he shrugged. "I don't know."

She chuckled.

He frowned. "What?"

"It's a yes or no question. If you don't know, then you can't possibly have done. Believe me. If you had, you would have remembered." She stroked his arm fondly and smiled at him. "It's alright. I don't think I had when I was your age either." She paused to think. "In fact, I don't think I did until I was much closer to my age now."

"Oh come off it. You're not that old."

She chuckled and smacked his arm lightheartedly. "You should hope you live to see my age the way you go about blowing things up the way you do."

"In my defense, I haven't blown myself up yet."

"_Yet_," she raised an eyebrow.

"I promise I'll always try to come home to you."

He kissed her lips and she nodded. They both knew that in their line of work, that was as good as it got as far as promises went.

He kissed her again, for a little longer this time, and with a little more passion so they could both feel it.

"Teach me."

"What?"

He caressed her cheek. "Teach me. I want to make love to you properly. Please. Show me."

She places a gentle kiss to his lips. "Dear boy. Do what feels right. But let it come from here," she placed a hand over his heart and looked into his eyes.

He nodded and kissed her again, slowly and tenderly. He took his time, learning the unique flavor of her. He'd noticed it before, of course, but he'd never really savored it before. He wasn't about it make that mistake again. He kissed her and meant it. He kissed her with all the love he had in him and he made sure she felt it. He thought it was strange that he was trying so hard to make her feel his love and yet it didn't seem at all forced. It seemed the most natural thing in the world.

Because it wasn't forced. It wasn't him doing his job. He wasn't putting on a show.

It was coming straight from his heart.

And it felt good.


	3. Your Lesson BeginsNow

It felt better than anything he'd ever felt before.

He pulled back and looked into her eyes and she smiled and caressed his cheek. She motioned for him to move further onto the bed and once they had settled in against the pillows there, they continued their kisses and caresses and his hands slowly traveled down her body to the tie on her robe. He found he wasn't in any great hurry to undress her again. He knew this time would be different. With a small nod from her, he undid the sash with one fluid motion and gently slid the robe from her shoulders, helping her slide it off completely before tossing it off the side of the bed. He kissed across her naked shoulder, up her neck, to her cheek before meeting her lips in a tender kiss that would have made her weak at the knees had she been standing.

Yes.

There.

These are the kisses she had been craving all this time. These are the kisses she had so longed to have. Sure the sex before was nice, but this… this is so much better. What he did before was what he did with everyone else, and she was never one to settle for what everyone else had. Her mother always used to say the world would be a very boring place if everyone had the very same things and went about things the very same way. She didn't want what everyone else had. She wanted the kisses that were meant just for her. The kisses that contained his heart. Nothing else would do. She loved him too much.

She loved him.

God help her. She loved him.

She wanted him.

She wanted him more than she's wanted any man for a long, long time. There was a hungry, edgy tension in the pit of her stomach; a deep, undeniable ache between her thighs.

His hand wandered down to her breast and a shiver ran down her spine. Her breath hitched and she arched into his touch as his fingertips ran over her rapidly hardening nipple.

"Yes," she gasped.

He pinched gently and she moaned. He continued his caresses and carefully studied her face, taking his time and learning what movements she liked more than others. He slowly declined his head to suckle at her breast, causing her to gasp and clutch at his head. She bit her lip and moaned and held him close to her, clearly enjoying what he was doing. He kneaded the full globes in his hands and smiled into her skin, but tried to keep himself steady in the rhythm he'd set with his lips and tongue. Inwardly, however, he was ecstatic that she was finally responding to him the way he'd longed for her to. And he knew it wasn't an act. He knew she really wanted him. Though he doubted it was possible that she could want him as much as he wanted her. He licked and swirled his tongue around her nipple, teasing the rosy bud until it stiffened into a taut peak, before trailing gently, open mouthed kisses across her chest to pay the same due attention to the opposite side. She slid her hands from his head to the sheets, gripping them in her fists and taking deep breaths in an effort to stop herself writhing.

She couldn't quite believe she was getting so flustered so easily, and yet, it shouldn't seem strange to her at all. Truth be told, it had been a long time since anyone had been so tender with her, had loved her in this way. She hadn't made love to anyone since her late husband. And even then they hadn't really made love in the later stages of their marriage. He got old and sick and she just got too old to bother. Or so she thought.

And then she met James.

She felt foolish and unprofessional, and a list of other names for herself, but she couldn't help it. She wanted him very early on, despite telling herself that she shouldn't or that he'd never feel the same way. How was she to know that her feelings were reciprocated?

She felt James's tongue lick a trail up the center of her chest, then kisses up the side of her neck, where he stopped to suck on her pulse point, causing her to give a low, throaty moan. He kissed her lips once more kissing his way down her body and she tensed.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she lied, forcing herself to relax.

"M, I felt that. What's wrong?" He gently stroked her thigh. "We don't have to do this right now if you're not comfortable. Do you want me to stop?"

"No. Please. I want this."

"Something's bothering you." He moved up the bed a little further and propped himself on one elbow, taking his free hand to stroke her cheek. "What is it? Tell me."

"My late husband tried that on occasion. It just didn't feel… well it didn't feel like much of anything really. I didn't really enjoy it."

James snorted. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't laugh." He stroked her arm. "It won't be the same." He promised. "Will you at least let me try?"

She nodded, but she still seemed unsure.

"If you don't like it, you can put me on desk duty for a whole week."

She chuckled. "Well you seem very confident in your abilities, Mr. Bond." She smirked. "Very well, 007. Get to work."

He grinned. "Yes, Ma'am."

He hovered over her again, kissing her cheeks, her neck, her chest, paying particular attention to her ample bosom, before making his descent down her body once more. He nuzzled into her soft belly, just below her ribcage, amused to discover that she was a bit ticklish, before continuing his journey downward. He kissed his way lower, across her hips and down her left leg, bending her leg at the knee, kissing her foot delicately. He kissed each toe and rubbed her foot a moment before kissing his way back up, across her hips again, and repeating the action on the opposite leg.

By this time, the only place he hadn't kissed was the place she most longed for his kisses.

"James, please," she breathed.

He smiled.

His fingers slide up her thighs and teased her entrance before sliding up her now wet core to caress her clit. She convulsed at his touch and her fists tightened their grip on the sheets. His fingers slid carefully into her molten hot flesh and she bit her lip as he pumped his thick fingers into her tight heat. He smirked, pushing her thighs a little further apart. He lightly sucked on the skin just above her extremely wet center. He wanted nothing more than to bury his face in his her cunt and lick the hell out of her, but he wanted to show her he was serious about wanting to make love to her properly. So if he was going to do this, he was going to make damn sure he was going to do it right.

M watched with dark eyes as his face pressed into her sex, earning a loud moan from deep within her. He sucked her clit into his mouth and she mewled and writhed beneath him.

"James!" she gasped. Her hands tugged the sheets upward as she felt his tongue flick over her sopping clit. His hands grasped her thighs, keeping her legs spread. He knew her; she would definitely clamp those powerful sexy legs around his head in a heartbeat.

'_So that's what it's supposed to feel like_,' she thought.

When he felt it was safe, he took his right hand and began thrusting his fingers into her, setting up a slow, deep rhythm, while his tongue worked her clit in and out of his mouth in the same manner that seemed to be driving her mad. He kept his eyes on her face while he moved his tongue in different directions to figure out which patterns she liked, so he'd know how best to bring her to orgasm. Once he had a pretty good idea, he smiled into her skin. He knew exactly what to do.

He slid his fingers out of her and he smiled at her whine of disappointment, which was quickly replaced by a moan.

"Oh!" Her eyes went wide as she felt his tongue take the place of his fingers inside her. His thumb rubbed small circles on her clit and the warm pink muscle worked wonders within her as she writhed on the bed. She thought it was a good thing he had such strong arms as, try as she might, she just couldn't manage to keep still. Her head tossed back and forth on the pillows and her breathing was becoming shallower by the minute. She didn't know how much more she could take.

James smirked, staring at her rapidly rising and falling chest, admiring her gorgeous breasts. He had dreamed of seeing her naked for years; to see more of the teasing glimpse of cleavage she had provided all those years. He felt himself harden even more, if that were at all possible. For a second, he thought he might just come from hearing her sounds of pleasure.

"Jam...Oh, god... _James_!" She screamed, moaning so loudly, gripping the sheets so tightly her knuckles were ghostly white. James inserted his tongue inside her, lapping at her inner walls and the nectar that freely flowed from her as she threw her head back and arched into his mouth. But he didn't stop there. He couldn't get enough of her. Even as she came, he kept licking, sucking at her until she came again. He wanted her to feel the pleasure she bestowed upon him each and every time she touched him. He wanted to show her that there was no other woman he would rather please, and that there was no other who could ever please him the way she did.

Dear God, she was about to come again!

"JAMES!" She screamed, her body convulsing with her second orgasm until she collapsed on the bed in a satisfied heap.

"No more… please… I can't…" she panted.

"Alright." James stretched out beside her and rubbed soothing circles on her thigh as she struggled to catch her breath.

When she'd finally settled down, she looked down at him and smiled. "You really didn't want desk work did you?" she chuckled.

He laughed. "So can I take that as a thumbs up?"

She shook her head. "Shut up and kiss me."

He giggled and moved up the bed, kissing her deeply. She felt his very prominent erection against her leg and realized he was still in need of some relief himself.

When she pulled away from the kiss, she looked down and saw with some disappointment that he was still wearing his shorts.

She raised an eyebrow. "You're overdressed."

"So I am."

He quickly rectified that situation and within seconds was atop her again.

"Ever the efficient one," she chuckled.

He grinned. "I aim to please."

To his surprise, she flipped them over to straddle him.

"Making love is about giving and taking, James," she whispered. "And it's always nice to have a change of scenery," she added with a wink. He chuckled and nodded his head in acknowledgement. He ran his hands up and down his arms.

"I've got an amazing view from here as well," he smiled.

"Am I too heavy for you?" He shook his head. Her hands caressed his face. "Do you know what I first noticed about you?"

He smiled. "No. What?"

"Your eyes. They were the most brilliant shade of blue I'd ever seen."

His smile grew wider. "I thought the same about yours."

"I thought you looked so incredibly sad… so angry for one so young."

"I guess I just hadn't met a good enough reason to smile yet." He leaned up and kissed her.

He pulled away and started to giggle.

"What?"

"I actually do remember having a bit of a crush on you… when I first started. I shook myself out of it, thinking it was just a sort of schoolboy having a crush on the headmistress thing and that it would pass. I thought it was the suit thing."

"Oh?" she smirked. She leaned down further so their chests pressed together and she traced the contour of his chin with her fingertip. "And what exactly were you thinking about?"

"You know… the usual."

He averted his eyes as he traced his fingertips over her shoulders and his cheeks reddened.

She tapped his cheek with her fingertip. "Tell me. I might be persuaded to do something about it."

His eyes snapped up at this and her smirk grew wider.

"Tell me."

He took a breath and looked her right in her eyes. "I used to imagine what you were wearing under them."

"Ahh…" she smirked. "And?"

"I thought you might wear something sensible… none of the lace and garters at the office, however, at home…"

"Yes?" her grin grew wider. He'd officially caught her attention.

"I thought at home, perhaps you'd allow for a little more… expression in your wardrobe. I imagined you in deep red negligees that stopped just at the thigh and sheer black stockings with garters…"

M began to slowly circle her hips as James was talking. She felt his erection stir beneath her and she could feel her own body begin to take interest in his story as well.

"Go on," she whispered.

"I had this dream where I'd come to your flat after a mission after having lost my keys and I'd find you there… in your robe…" he rolled his hips beneath her, just barely biting back a groan. "…a deep red kimono to match your nightie. And you'd open the door… and I couldn't speak. I'd just stare at you. And you'd drag me inside and ask me what happened to me and I'd tell you. And you'd call me a silly little boy." He'd grabbed her hips by this point. She had her hands on either side of his head for leverage and ground her hips down harder against his impressive length. This wasn't exactly where she'd planned to go with this, but hell, the train was rolling. Why not blow the whistle?

"I'd ask you what happened to the suit… if you always pranced around in that sort of thing… and you'd tell me to mind my business and you said… ungh!" he groaned loudly as he felt a small rush of moisture drip onto his erection.

"What did I say?" her voice quivered.

"I- I need to be in you."

"No. What did I say?"

"You told me… not to mouth off to my superiors. And then… you said since I had such a big mouth, I may as well make good use of it… and you made me…mmmmmm" he whimpered. "M… please…"

"What did I do?" her hips jerked forward involuntarily.

"You pulled me toward the sofa and you tore open your robe and you made me kneel on the floor in front of you… and you spread your legs open… and you weren't wearing any knickers… you didn't have to tell me twice. I grabbed your legs and buried my face between your thighs and licked your until you screamed. Oh god. Please let me-"

"Yes," she gasped. She lifted and positioned herself over his erection and rapidly impaled herself on his massive length, earning a loud groan from both of them. Their moans echoed throughout the room. Each time his hips thrust up into her, hers came crashing down and they were both so on edge, they knew it wouldn't last very long, but neither one cared very much. James could feel her inner walls clenching around him as she frantically rode him, holding his forearms for support. Her orgasm slammed into her faster than she expected and she fell forward with a loud cry, the latter half of which became muffled in his chest. Her orgasm triggered his and his arms tightened around her as his come splashed against her womb.

His ragged breathing was hot and heavy in her ear, but unlike before, she didn't feel the need to push him away. She lifted her head and kissed him deeply and he rolled her onto her back again, careful to remain inside of her, and kissed her back passionately.

He pulled away and looked into her eyes. "You have no idea how beautiful you are."

She snorted. "I'm a post-menopausal dwarf. There is nothing beautiful about me."

"There is everything beautiful about you."

She rolled her eyes and let out a small giggle. "If you say so."

"I do, as a matter of fact." He smiled and taped the end of her nose, giving her a quick peck on the lips.

"Is that so?"

"Yes."

"Well I outrank you. I don't have to listen." She arched her eyebrow defiantly and smirked.

He rolled his hips making her arch her back.

"Bloody cheat," she gasped.

He chuckled. "Always."

He did it again.

"You can't be ready _again!_" she feigned exasperation, but she was not-so-secretly thrilled.

"I'm always ready for you, M."

"Insatiable."

He nuzzled her neck and nipped at her pulse point making her moan. She wriggled her hips and could feel he was indeed getting hard again. His hand traveled down her side to tease her nipple and she moaned even louder. When he pinched the hardening peak, she arched and turned her head, giving him unlimited access to her neck. He dipped his head and assaulted her neck with open mouthed kisses, some of which she was sure would leave marks in the morning, but she was positive her suit collars were high enough to cover them. And even if they weren't, she really couldn't bring herself to care at this moment in time.

This man is entirely too gifted with his mouth.

He started rocking his hips a bit faster, keeping a fairly steady rhythm but taking care to thrust especially deep. He put a pillow underneath her waist and brought her legs up around his hips, changing the angle so that he hit her g-spot with every stroke.

Well he wouldn't be James if he didn't show off just a little, she supposed.

He was completely hard now and driving her completely crazy all over again. She couldn't remember the last time she had so many orgasms in one night. Although it was very difficult to remember much of anything at the moment with a handsome man shagging her senseless. It was also possible that the reason she couldn't remember the last time she she'd had so many orgasms in one night is because she'd never before in her life had so many orgasms in one night. Not even by herself. She was certain they had to be breaking some sort of record.

She idly wondered if it was possible to be fucked to death.

But, what a way to go.

She gasped and clutched and James's shoulders. She could feel the tingling tendrils of her orgasm begin to stretch throughout her body and she could tell by the way his hips began to falter that he wasn't too far off himself.

"James… I need… I need something…"

"Anything."

Her breath hitched.

"Say my name."

He raised himself up on his forearms so he could look at her.

"Say my name. The real one. I need- ah!- gods," she panted. "Please. Say my name."

He looked into her eyes and smiled.

Her eyes fluttered closed and he lowered himself so that his mouth hovered just beside the shell of her ear. In soft sweet whisper.

"I love you so much… _Olivia_."

Her eyes snap open and the last of her control breaks.

"Oh god!"

What starts as a gasp of pleasure erupts into a primal scream of completion, to both their surprise. She can't seem to stop the cries of passion that tear from her throat and James makes no effort to silence her. In fact he urges her on, encourages her to ride out the waves of pleasure. Her nails dig into his skin a bit more and he's sure she's marked him, but he doesn't mind at all. In fact he loves the idea that he's now marked as her territory.

This is one thing he will never tire of; one thing that will never grow old, no matter how many times he sees it happen.

Seeing her in the throes of passion is a sight more beautiful than he could ever have dreamed of. He wasn't prepared to be so moved by the vision before him. And a vision she was. There was nothing like seeing her so unguarded, letting go of the ice queen, letting go of M and the strain of MI6 and allowing herself to simply be herself. A beautiful, loving, caring, intelligent, witty, passionate, sensual woman who currently had James wrapped around her finger.

Looking up and seeing her orgasm sends James over the edge faster than anything else ever had and before he could catch himself, he came hard, his shout of completion echoing off the walls.

He slumps over, just barely managing to catch himself on his forearms so as not to crush her, before carefully rolling off to one side. She turns to him, draping and arm over his torso and cuddling close, letting out a contented sigh as she draws lazy patterns on his stomach with her fingertips.

"Hang on," he sat up and slid off the edge of the bed.

"What?"

She watched as he walked around to the edge of the bed and ruffled around in the blanket box for a while. He retrieved a quilt and got back in bed, pulling the thinner sheet over them, and then spreading the quilt out over them both.

"You took the duvet with you earlier. I don't want you catching a chill," he explained.

"So considerate." She smiled. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome." He kissed her forehead and hugged her.

"I am sorry for the way I reacted earlier, by the way," she said softly. She sighed. "It's just that… I hadn't told anyone I loved them… since my late husband. I suppose I was scared of history repeating itself."

"You don't have to explain," he put his arm around her.

"Yes I do," she said. "I owe you at least that. We were both field agents at the time. We were only supposed to be using each other for cover stories, nothing more. But after a while, we found we had more in common than we first realized, and we figured as long as we were living together and assumed married anyway… why not?"

"Of course." He rubbed her shoulder.

"We lived quite happily together for a long while. But of course in this line of work, happiness is often fleeting. We both got assigned to long missions in different parts of the world and couldn't see each other for extended periods of time. Often times sleeping with targets was a part of the job, and we knew that going in, but it didn't mean we had to like it. And of course when we got back we weren't authorized to discuss anything with each other and sooner or later all those secrets just… get in the way. He was a nice man, don't mistake me, we just… couldn't have worked. Love just wasn't enough then."

"Do you think it'll be enough now? Do you think we can work?"

"Do _you_ think we can?" she countered.

"You mean provided I don't get myself blown up in the near future? I don't see why not."

"I see a very good reason why not. I'm not a young woman, James. I don't doubt that you love me, but I don't want you to give up the rest of your life to be with me."

"I'm not giving up anything by being with you. If anything, I'm gaining a life." He sighed. "Look, I can't claim to know what's gonna happen with us, but I do want to try. And I know you do too."

"But a family. Children. I can't give you any of that."

"Honestly, I closed the door on all that when I became an agent. I don't really care about all that. It's you I want. I just want you."

She smiled. "Then you've got me."

She snuggled into his arms and laid a hand across his chest as he stroked her hair. They stayed that way for some time, enjoying a comfortable silence, until she drifted off to sleep on his shoulder.


	4. Epilogue

He looked down and smiled at the way her hair was tousled from their lovemaking just moments before. He kissed the top of her head, gently resting his chin there afterward. Her arms tightened their hold around him just a bit before she relaxed into his arms again, murmuring something in her sleep. James smiled down at her and pulled the duvet over her just a little more as he snuggled down next to her for the night.

Or should he say morning?

He cast a glance out the window and he could just see the sun peeking over the London skyline. He smiled to himself. They'd been at it all night.

No.

They hadn't 'been at it'. They'd made love.

He'd made love to the love of his life all night long, and he was now well and truly exhausted.

For Queen and Country…

Bullshit.

It's always been for her.

He's never wanted to belong to anything or anyone else.

No matter where in the world he went, whenever he came back, he always headed straight for her flat. She knew breaking and entering had become something of a humorous, if illegal, running gag for him over the years, but contrary to her belief, he didn't do it for the scotch. Despite what he told her, he did it because he needed to see her first thing. Tanner and the others could wait. Queen and bloody country could wait. He just needed to see her face. He needed to know that she was alright. She was the reason he went on mission after mission. She was also the reason he kept coming back, whether or not she knew it at the time.

When she woke up he would ask about maybe moving some of his things to her place so he could stay more often. Or, if she liked, a more permanent arrangement. He didn't mind. He could set up camp anywhere. Four walls are only temporary.

Truth be told, she's the only thing that ever felt like home.


End file.
